… excuse my French. People on all sides are unhappy. Something has to be done. My suggestions are – 1 – Revoke article 50 for 2 years and continue being an EU member and having British MEPs. 2 – After 2 years hold another referendum asking exactly the same question as last time […]
I would like to ban hair to Room 101. It has an unpredictable mind of it’s own and serves no useful purpose. As the years meander along the hair on your noddle loses the will to live and the energy that it once spent is redirected to all those secret places where hair lurks. The […]
I have invented the ever-lasting and interactive firework! Imagine the excitement of the family gathered round as this magnificent invention is hurled into the air and everyone has a wondeful time going “Whooooosh, ahhhhhhhhh, BANG!!!!!†It can then be picked up, so long as it’s been thrown thoughtfully and carefully of course, and then used […]
Over the billions of years that the universe has been floating around there have been a smidge under an infinite number of coincidences that have made this and that. This is all very jolly and extremely groovy. That is until these were created in 1963. Now… if there is a deity or deities in charge […]
A recent conversation with Siri when I was trying to find out where the phrase ‘nooks and crannies’* came from. “Do you mean rooks and grannies?†“No – try again†“Do you mean books and nanny?†“No – try again†“Do you mean norks and fannies?†“No!!! – well – erm – no, better not. […]
I’ve been trying to come up with a collective noun for all those annoying people in the media* who like to be known as ‘journalists’. I have had some success after failing with ‘smug’, an ‘opinion’ and a ‘oh dear my head is stuffed up my own arse’ of journalists. The end result? – A […]
Would the world feel happier with teacup carrying armadillos as the dominant species? .
