I made a titanic effort the other day and decided to cook for Lo, she is a terrible Goddess. She has done nearly all the cooking over the years and I thought it would be lovely if she had the day off.
I chose a simple meal – baked beans on toast with bacon bits.
I opened the can of beans and managed to slop them on the work surface. I cleared that up.
I over cooked the bacon bits. They ended up looking like the final scenes from The Towering Inferno. They also set off the smoke alarm. As I rushed across the room to turn it off I slipped on the beans that had, unbeknownst to me, fallen on the floor. I crashed into the counter breaking several mugs and knocked the toaster off which crashed to the ground spilling crumbs all over the place. The toast flew out and landed in the dustpan.
I stood up, squeezed some washing up liquid into the fire alarm to shut it up, scooped up the toast, dusted it off and placed it on a plate. I scraped out the few remaining beans from the saucepan onto the toast and sprinkled the bacon over the top, adding some red sauce to try and get the colour right ……. success!
I carried the delectation to the TG.
Miraculously she seemed to enjoy it.
“Delicious Peabrain – thank you – I’ll tidy up the kitchen as you’ve gone to so much effort.”
I decided to go out – sharpish …………..
( Yes,I really said that – in that parallel universe Peabrain inhabits. Lo,TG Ed)
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Stumble It!
6 Comments
So what was wrong? Everything sounds just about normal.
As normal as when I play games in the kitchen.
Ooooo – what games do you play? I sometimes practice my juggling …… and then we eat omelettes …..
when you return you’d better be bringing flowers and chocolates. a diamond ring might not go astray either. And hide the golf clubs.
Anything else I should do? ……. *busily scribbling notes*
‘It’s the thought that counts’ – but in your case I think we might have to make an exception….
I always seem to be ‘proving’ rules …… someone has to do it I suppose …….
Well you are pretty exceptional…
So’s Keith Chegwin …….. oh noooooooooooooo
oh wow, that exact same thing happened to me!
Are you tellin’ the truth Nooter or was it one of your back leg kicking dreams?
I over cooked the bacon bits. They ended up looking like the final scenes from The Towering Inferno.
They ended up looking like a dirty and sweaty Steve McQueen?
Good thing they didn’t end up looking like the Robert Wagner character…. she would’ve caught on for sure.
Stop trying to excite the goddesses Fraccy – I have enough trouble around here as it is ……..
Once again ‘Some Mother’s do ‘ave ‘em ‘ springs to mind …
…… and, spookily, I used to get quite annoyed with that programme ……
…… although the line “Legs apart Betty!” still makes me smile ………
superb line