This is the first edition, and possibly the last, of my new online newspaper that is all about everything Canadian.
From my recent experiences of everything Canadian, Canadialand must be peopled by very good looking, attractive and intelligent people.
Every man, woman and child must be extremely quiet and shy (HUH!).
They are excellent at chopping up lettuce leaves.
Obviously an abstemious race (HUH!) and yet they invent alcoholic drinks that contain clam juice.
I had assumed that they all wear bearskins and Davy Crockett hats but this doesn’t seem to be the case unless of course they make an especial effort when travelling or going to a weeding wedding.
I have never heard one break wind.
This rounds up everything I know about Canadians … so far.
(Yet another in depth report from our insightful foreign correspondent DP – Daddy Prober)