…..and a voice said unto me
“GO FORTH INTO YOUR WILDERNESS AND SLASH AND BURN [using a really nifty chainsaw from B&Q - only £29.99 and several boxes of matches because I was never a boy scout] AND CLEAR THE GROUND FOR WHAT IS YOURS BY RIGHT [ right from the house – of course - with my back to the sea it’s on the left].
UPON THIS HOLEY GROUND [actually I’m going to fill the holes in and then concrete over it] THOU MUST ERECT A SHED [yippee!].
AND IN THIS SHED MUST BE AN ARMCHAIR AND A WINDOW THAT LOOKETH OUT TO SEA AND THERE MUST ALSO BE A MIRROR OF THE FINEST QUALITY POSITIONED THUSLY TO WARN OF IMPENDING DISASTER [that’ll be the terrible Goddess]. UPON SIGHT OF DANGER YOU MUST ARISE AND PICK FORTH A HAMMER, A NAIL AND A PIECE OF WOOD AND LOOK BUSY. WHENETH THE DANGER HAS PASSÉD THE ARMCHAIR MUST BE FILLED WITH YOUR POSTERIOR UNTIL THE WORLD ENDETH [or dinner, whichever is sooner].
SO I SPAKE AND IT SHALL BE SO ….. GO FORTH AND SHEDDIFY!!!
(Yea verily, I say unto you if the armchair is filled too often by thy posterior then indeed shall thy world crash about thine ears, oh Peabrain. I think not that there is need for a further lesson. Lo,TG Ed)
Stumble It!
8 Comments
you getting a she then???
I’ve a she already, She who must be dismayed. I might be preparing the way for a SHED however ….. de dum de dum hum hum hum ……..
did you steal my ‘d’?… you rascal ….
I’ve warned you about attempting commenting before 7:30 in the morning – particularly on a MONDAY!!!!!
I will take heed as you hath spake it …. the braineth ’tis alivest now I that I had the veritable joy of partaking in a bevy of brews of the finest Grey of the Earl
Alas I musteth skidaddleth from this fine posted blog and wend my merry way (through the gales and rain) to that place that recompenses me greatly for simply daring to enter the ivory towers of discovery and nonsense
ta tah lah!!
OK – carry on – tee hee
So you are hearing the voices again….it never ends well.
….. and what’s more, they are getting very LOUD ….. must mean the ’shed’ thing is important I suppose ….
[note to self - use the word 'studio' - sounds much grander and meaningful]
Could be my eyes (all that wine yesterday), but are you sure that patch of ground is big enough for a shed that will have room for you, an armchair AND the altar ?
The *ahem* STUDIO – will accommodate all the necessities – perhaps even a fridge ……….
To shed or not to shed, that is the question.
Whether ’tis nobler in the kennel to suffer
The fleas and ticks of outrageous appetite,
Or to take nibbles against this coat of fur,
And by chewing, remove it?
I shall print this out, frame it and hang it in pride of place in the ’studio’ when I’ve built it ….. ta
Are you inferring that DP is ‘in the doghouse’ again Archie ?
Good point GW ……… and the answer is usually yes by default …..
My Brother tells me the rates are very reasonable at your boarding kennels, how would you like a very well-behaved pup for a few days? My place isn’t so concise now.
Hello Westie ……… am I sensing a business opportunity here? …… I’ll put you on the list ….
My Bruv said you would be the first one to leave a comment at WestieWorld, how will you find time to build a shed if you are reading all these blogs?
More to the point how will I find time for my afternoon snooze ……… followed by toasted muffins and a cuppa …….. oh well
‘Sheddify’ – Thanks, I have stored this in my list of emergency verbs.
Just let me know if you need any more ……