I thought it was time to introduce a few more of the new neighbours.
Mr. & Mrs. Golightly, who never had any children, lavish all their love and attention on the garden. Most of the time they live in complete harmony, dead-heading, weeding and trimming, although there was a bit of a kerfuffle the other day when Mr. Golightly experimented with some pinking shears to trim the edge of the lawn – Mrs. Golightly didn’t approve and didn’t go lightly on Mr. Golightly at all. I know who wears the trousers in that household.
I don’t know who wears the trousers in No 9, but the gay couple who live there are charm personified. I’ve picked up quite a few tips on sartorial elegance from Tom and a lot of information about hair ‘product’ from Eric.
Next door to them lives Brenda. Now retired, he regales anyone who will listen with stories about his life in the merchant navy, and how a trip to Thailand changed his life completely. I won’t go into details but I will say it involved a lot of drink and a sharp knife.
I won’t mention the Corduroy’s drinking habits either. Suffice it to say the Council decided to put a bottle recycling bin in their garden to keep their carbon footprint to a minimum. I am compiling details and a flow chart to show the relationship between the number of bottles re-cycled and the time their bedroom curtains are opened in the morning. It should be fascinating.
I intend to keep you up to date with ‘doings’ in the cul-de-sac every now and again. I don’t want to give you too much information all at once, as I know that most of you have difficulty concentrating for more than a couple of minutes. (I’m just amazed that they don’t drift all off to sleep. Ha! That’s it – they’re all insomniacs, seeking a cure. Lo,TG Ed)
I’d be very grateful BTW, if anyone can tell me what the French for cul-de-sac is – thank you.
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Stumble It!
9 Comments
Gosh…I just hope your new neighbors realize how FORTUNATE they are to have such an observant fellow neighbor like yerself! Think they are taking notes?
Cul-de-sac is French?
I suspect they’ll be holding secret meetings young Olga …. tee hee.
zzzz zzzzzz zzz ooops you have finished I just dozed of their for a minute
“Brenda”?? you’d have thought he would have chosen a more exotic name ….
anyway can you please send Tom ‘n’ Eric oop Norff pwweese to sort my scruff bag gay neigbours thank you
p.s have they accepted your box affliction?
It is his given name which probably goes some way to explain his actions ……… and everyone is quite happy about my box ….. in fact they encourage it. Gertrude isn’t too popular though, particularly with the Golightlys, ever since the time he escaped and did some browsing …….
Please tell me you didn’t untether Gerty too soon??
Most of the time he’s on the bungee rope – down the cliff and then up on the top of the trees …… he’s only escaped a couple of times ……
handy hint .. always test your elastic
OK …….. *ouch* …… seems fine …….
how do I know you have just twanged your undercracker elastic???
I refuse to provide evidence!!!!
Following the Golightly’s logic and seeing your garden, I wonder why you never mention ALL your other children?
This either means that I’m officially brain dead now or your brain has gone off at such a tangent that there aren’t enough degrees in a circle, but I have no idea what you’re talking about young Linky ……. HANG ON … are you saying my garden is a tad untidy!!!!?! … and that every weed represents a by-blow? …… I’ll have to do some research …….. whoooooooosh
Tès vachmen tintillgen! Ok, I need to whooooosh as well or I miss the weekend.
A weekend – what’s that?
A Weekend is like yes in French followed by a county in southeastern England on the English Channel.
Voilà
c’est une impasse! comme ton blog
Mercy buckets Sylvie ….. so there’s no way out then? …… oh dear ……..
Good Lord – I think your neighbours have been cloned and moved to the Midlands – they sound just like mine!
Good heavens – I had no idea the problems were so far reaching ……..
Talking about being nosey….. can’t wait for part II!!
Neither can I!!!!! ……. I wonder when I’ll write it …… mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm [you'd better find something to sniff in the interim]
When I was holidaying in Crete many years ago, my mate Paul’s ship was in port and we were invited on board for a tour.
It was a massive Royal Fleet Auxillary vessel. One of the crew was a gay chap whose nickname was ‘Rince and Mince’, he was camp as can be and when going ashore would wear women’s clothes and full make-up.
He had been on the ship for many years and in the Falklands War, he was awarded a medal for shooting down an enemy plane.
Great post BTW, I too can’t wait for ‘Twitchers 2′
I had a very camp friend when I was at college. A couple of times we bumped into each other at Charing Cross ….. public places always made him very ‘touchy feely’ – I was a bit shocked the first time but joined in when it happened again ….. twas very funny ….
I made lots of money taking gay customers from the Bognor Butlins Holiday Centre to Brighton (I won’t tell you about the conversations we had), it was amazing how many homophobic drivers we had.
cul-de-sac: street closed at one end: a road with no exit at one end, often in a residential area
This is where alien invasions start first – a road with no exit at one end – get it?
I suspect your neighbors are aliens, so you keep those curtains twitching.
I really don’t think the French have anything to do with the impending attack.
I’m really sorry this is my first comment on your blog and I’m scaring you. But The Reforming Geek got me started on alien and zombie talk. It’s all her fault.
Well Sue, however frightened I am now has been ameliorated by the fact that you didn’t shave your head – now that would have been scary ……. [blame shifting is GOOD ...... I employ this strategy several times a day]