Let me introduce myself, illustrious Sir or Madam
My father, an Algerian, has long fallen off the wagon,
But before he died, as his last breath did wheeze,
He told me a great secret and hoped that I’d be pleased.

He left behind a pile of sand that when I had it dug,
Revealed a hoard of plunder – mainly golden mugs.
Imagine my predicament, I knew not what to do
With taxes high and my bad back – and then I thought of you!

I’ll sell the gold and then I’ll quickly forward the proceeds,
To you my trusted new found friend – I know that we’ll succeed.
And for your trouble in this matter I offer this reward:
A million pounds, a timeshare and a jewel encrusted sword.

If you would kindly let me have, and please be very quick
[This is a genuine offer not a devil’s walking stick],
Full details of your bank accounts with necessary pins.
This is a very cunning plan where everybody wins.

I’m looking forward very much to getting your reply
So we can all divide and share a portion of this pie..
I’m sincerely yours for all the help I know you’re sure to offer.
Signed Sister Beatrice of the Church of the Empty Coffer.