Category Archives: History lessons

THE FORGOTTEN HOBBIT

When Tolkien removed all  mention of Floppy Baggins  from the Lord of the Rings he became the forgotten hobbit. The reasons were never fully explained but I have my suspicions. Floppy Baggins wasn’t very bright, indeed, his last known meaningful synapse coincided with the completion of his potty training – rather like the staff at […]

THE DAWN OF CIVILISATION

Darren, a caveman, liked to spend a few days alone about every four weeks: he crept away on the days when, for some reason he couldn’t fathom, his little Mirabelle got very ratty with him. He was getting a tad bored on the other side of the hill and decided to practise folding large leaves, […]

A FORGOTTEN ART

The fine art of Spadgering has unfortunately been largely forgotten [apart from some pockets where the sport is still practised in rural areas on the East coast of England (Ar, that’ll be Norfolk then. Lo,TG Ed)] so I thought it would be worth recording the main rules although I played the game only a couple […]

HADDOCK WRANGLING

Many years ago this extreme sport was only conducted in secret; the darkened beach huts along the coast of Essex showing no signs of activity to the casual passer-by. Of course, as we all know, it gradually came out of these shore-line closets and became very popular with professional and amateur alike.  The unforgettable efforts […]

HISTORY LESSON – 11

Winnie-the-Pooh was first published in 1926. Of course, he was quite old already – A.A. Milne took ages to get round to writing about him. I have always hoped, as no doubt you have, that I was related to Mr Sanders. I have undertaken some extensive and thorough research and have some really wonderful news. […]

HISTORY LESSON -10

I have been making a very careful study of the cave paintings to be found in Milton Keynes and have made a remarkable discovery concerning the invention of the wheel. Ugh the Caveman was very fond of biscuits. Not gingernuts of course, that would be ridiculous. They were an oatmeal confection cooked in hairy mammoth […]

HISTORY LESSON – 9

Le Carnaval des Animaux (The Carnival of the Animals) is a musical suite of fourteen movements by the French Romantic composer Camille Saint-Saëns. The orchestral work has a duration between 22 and 30 minutes. There are fourteen movements: I- Introduction et marche royale du Lion (Introduction and Royal March of the Lion) Strings and two […]

A BRIEF HISTORY OF TIME

Stephen Hawking had a quite a good stab at this subject, but there were several omissions.  (He’ll be dead gutted you said that! LO,TG Ed) He left out the derivations of certain words and the reasons why they are associated with time. Decade. When this was first introduced into the English language it was not […]

HISTORY LESSON – 8

The Forth Bridge The Forth Bridge was built by Sir William Arrol & Co. between 1883 and 1890. Sir Benjamin Baker – “one of the most remarkable civil engineers Britain ever produced” – and his colleague Allan Stewart, received the major credit for it’s design and were responsible for overseeing the building work. During its […]

HISTORY LESSON – 7

THE TORTOISE OLYMPICS The first tortoise Olympic Games were held in 1832. The use of a cannon to start the long jump was banned in 1909, when Archibald ‘Cara Pace’ Thomas the Third couldn’t be found after the event. (Avid Reader, you’re thinking the time scale doesn’t add up – a strict time table cannot […]