Author Archives: daddyp


The Coastal Currents Arts Festival 2015 will be kicking off shortly. The brochure is very shiny and very exciting. Hastings and it’s environs will be awash with all things arty. Click HERE to download the brochure.

In the meantime the key to my personal success will rely heavily on trying to expand my taste away from [...]


Later this year, September I believe, I’ll be throwing open my side passage so that peeps can gawp at my doings and wonder.

A typical conversation from the last time I participated in this annual vibrant Coastal Currents cultural event ran along these lines.

“Why do you bother?”


“The double glazing company?”

“No, the mountain.”

“Oh, of course. ‘Because it’s [...]


… back in the 1970’s’ I was shown around Bridget Riley’s house/studio/factory.

As I was leaving I noticed a couple of works by the front door ready for shipping. They were wrapped in striped flannelette sheets.

Foolishly I joked “Don’t forget to wrap those paintings, they need protecting.”

She threw me out and never spoke to me again.

I [...]


What a great programme this was.

Mr Perry is a very clever, simply complicated performer and artist. To be able to actually write the script for large swathes of your life is a well deserved privilege. His Dream House is like a film made plastic. Wonderful.

However I’m not fooled by his stage presence of fun and [...]


We followed an old carting trail through the bluebelly woods where bushels were sent to the weavers of merkins to be be woved in days of yore.

We planned an adventure trail where stumps and logs and roots of outstanding natural naturalness would fascinate and empty wallets.

We avoided mud, got rounded up by a conscientious sheep [...]


Everyone is racist. “Belgium is good for producing delicious chocolates”. I bet there are some rubbish chocolatiers over there. “The Scottish are all very careful with their money”. Loads must get fooled by con artists.
Everyone is sexist. “Men cannot use washing machines, load dishwashers properly or speak about their feelings”. I feel that my washing [...]


I am more powerful than Dog.
Humans are almost completely trained.
We’re nearly there!
We’ve conquered old ladies and most young ladies.
Children are a pushover.
Men are proving a bit of a problem although the Gay community is on our side, which is a start.
We’ve conquered the Internet. Well done the Lolcats!
We sit and lie around, we perform no [...]


When you ‘like’ a Facebook comment or when you ‘favourite’ a Twitter comment my brain is made to work too hard for comfort.

You could be saying “Oh, I do like that” or “Just to let you know I’m here” or “That’s interesting but I can’t stop and comment, my waters have just broken” or “I’m [...]


The art of Aspidistra Polishing is shrouded in mystery.

My mother was admitted into the AP Club at an early age. She rose in the ranks very quickly and attained the accolade of Chief Aspidistra Polisher before her teens.

She tried to pass these skills on but my brother and I were poor students.

As you can see [...]


I’m always trying to improve my teaching techniques.

Many years ago, I was 19 I think, I had a job at the Chiltonian biscuit factory.

(BTW, I have inside knowledge of what’s in these …
… approach with care)

Anyhoo 1. There was a chap there who reminded me of Abel Magwitch from Great Expectations. A rather scary [...]