In the interests of scientific discovery I am going to write this post whilst downing 3 double whiskies in close succession.
In order to keep the subject matter on a safe level I shall describe the weather and steer away from religion and politics.
Most of Gt. Britain is suffering a lot of snow but, tucked down here in the South … oh hang on …… the doorbell has just rung …. *ouch* ….. who put that table there? ….
It’s OK, it’s just the vicar …. trying to save our souls again ….. the TG is talking to him ……
Now where was I? oh yes, the weather or should it be whether – tee hee ….
Mmmm …… I wonder what he wears under his cassock? …… I might just have a peek …..
……. whoops, he didn’t like that. I pretended I’d dropped a pin and everything …. oh well, now where was I again? ……. oh yes, the whatever …. BTW, he wears undercrackers with a picture of the Prime Minister on them – tee hee ……. and he looks so ‘conservative’ *giggle* …… not that I wish to ‘labour’ the point ……. *snigger*
Remember DP, NO religion or politics and for goodness sake don’t mention DRUIDS ….. apparently they don’t wear undercrackers at all …..
OK, the snow snow sleet sleet snow didn’t …….. ooooo, the vicar is looking good actually ….. I wonder if he’s been working out? I’ll ask him …..
…… well, that was interesting ……… not! …….. and why does he keep glancing over here …….. he fancies me!!!! ….. that’s it!! ….. if you’ve got it, you’ve got it I suppose…. he lurrrrrrrrrves me …….
Concentrate!!! – once upon a time there was a ….. no, that’s wrong … mmmmm
Ooooo – he’s going!!! I’d better go and wave …… *crash* ……. it’s OK I’m fine …… why is the room spinning round? …….. where’s the Vicar? ……. Why is the TG taking my laptop away? ……… why? why? why? …….. oooo, LOOK!!! …. a cerise elephant ……….. with WINGS………………
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(You can’t just see a PINK elephant, can you? Always have to go one better. Lo,TG Ed)
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Stumble It!
11 Comments
This post is clearly a total case of whisky-inspired fiction.
Know how I know?
All this talk of the Vicar visiting.
Just exactly who the party guilty of wearing the Ministerial undercrackers is, remains to be resolved.
At least we know we can eliminate me. I happen to prefer the Jack Sparrow undercrackers… but shush… don’t tell anyone about that, ok?
Your secret is perfectly safe with me young Fraccy – I won’t tell a soul …… shusssssh ……
Any ideas who the soul (pretending to be the Vicar) might be?
This is going to keep me from sleeping you know…
I’ll search my brain and let you know …… it might take some time unfortunately …… sorry Fraccy.
Whiskey on the rocks is always an insult to the maker. He has sought out the best and purest water to mix with his blend and then some know-everything drinker goes and adds just any old water in the form of “rocks”.
At least you didn’t mention the war – - -
Good point Archie – that would have been dreadful. Mind you I don’t think he was German. If he was, he had an excellent English accent.
Don’t worry about the whisky, I can only afford the very cheapest and the chlorine from the tap water in the ice is a vast improvement to taste …..
It was the Civil War I was hoping you wouldn’t mention. The one where the Puritans tried to remove all fun from life. Just like Vicars do today.
I believe some vicars are quite gay ……..
I hope that wasn’t a malt whiskey. You should never put ice in a malt whiskey. Oh no.
Wotcha Zed! Please cast your pretty eye upwards to the last comment. What you do with your other eye is completely up to you of course …..
You’d think “An experiment” might entail some element of scientific rigour. I mean where’s your hypothesis, man? Assumptions? Conclusions? I suppose we’ll just have to settle for repeatable results and predictability.
But I drew a Venn diagram and everythink ……. and then coloured it in so it looked like a clown’s head – tee hee
you said it was lucozade!!!
[no internet at home *sugar bugger* *stamps feet*..... sneakily posting from the office... shushhhhh!!]
If I had ever paid any tax I would of course be disgusted by this misuse of public time and equipment – as it is I’m delighted.
You said it was lucozade – not me – and it wasn’t – so there! – na na nah nah na ……
hee hee ,…..
any way it was you who said ’twas Lucozade… check your Twitter…. mmmm missing Twitter and Facebook etc etc boo hoo
Did I? I must have been drunk ….. and get on with your work!!!!
yeah I am back …..
“And what is your opinion of Virgin Media young 70’s?” – *shoves microphone up her nose*
“*bleep|* *bleep* *bleep* … nuff said !!”
Well said!!! – tee hee
i now have a personal goal to assure that “undercrackers” becomes the default word for “underwear” in the US of A.
Oh, and 3 whiskies for breakfast? Perhaps with toast?
Posted early but written lately ….
If there is anything I can do to help promote “undercrackers” in the US of A please let me know …..
Ahhh my drinky poo, I knew I’d find it, I left it in good hands! Now I want it back or else…..
Hugs old man, Sugar<3
Hello Sugar, how are you doing? I was only looking after your drink for you …….. and I tested it as well, just in case ………
What an interesting experiment! But as every good scientist knows, you must repeat your experiment several times (at least) to make sure that the 1st results weren’t an accident.
What were the results anyway? My extremely scientific mind is wondering…
The main result was that Clerics can look remarkably attractive in black dresses ……
is it really good?
….. and I edited again!!!!!